It’s been an interesting journey these last 8-10 months or so since I started taking CBD. I have tried CBD from many different vendors and in tincture, gummy and softgel formats. Since the heart surgery, I have had significant pain in my hip and gluteus area. The doctor doesn’t know exactly what it is but I was really hoping CBD would help with the pain. Really, it’s done very little to nothing. I don’t think it is an inflammation-based pain so maybe that’s part of it, but I thought CBD was more broad-ranged pain relief, but not for me. As far as mental health, anxiety and such, I can’t tell how it’s been. Maybe at times, it has made me feel better, but I haven’t been taking it at all for the past two weeks and I don’t feel much different.

The biggest problem is the cost. This stuff is expensive, there are no two ways about it. For a month’s supply of anything, you’re looking at at least $50 and probably more. If you game this out to a year, it’s completely unsustainable, especially for the minimal effects I am getting. Now for others, it might be working much better. Everyone’s body chemistry is different, so you’ll have to make your own evaluation. For me, this is the end of the line for CBD. I still believe in CBD and cannabis medicine in general and I really hope we will get better research as legalization spreads. I also hope, someday, CBD will be treated as a true medicine that can be prescribed by a doctor and covered by insurance. I also hope for sensible regulation and better standards for dosage and use.

I’m in a weird place with my mental health that’s hard to describe. I don’t feel depressed or anxious as such, but I don’t feel great either. It’s a strange kind of purgatory, neither up nor down. Most of the psych drugs I find help with depression or anxiety but I don’t want that. Most of those drugs make you feel not depressed, but not actually optimistic. I just want to feel a little better, a little more hope and brightness. What’s the drug for that?